[Private] Scribbled on a tiny little notebook.
So.
1. I am going to die without painting for one last time because I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't need to do so for a week. Now, look at me.
2. I am going to die alone because I've been spending all my time with this amazing guy who, as it turns out, is a weirdo who sends mixed signals, gives me the - unsolicited - orgasm of a lifetime and then disappears (not literally).
3. #2 because I do not feel comfortable asking for favors. Ever. And if he wanted me, he could say so. He hasn't.
4. Savannah isn't an option either, she probably hates me to a somewhat deep degree.
5. I am crying for my little brother and my family, friends, and acquaintances whom I've neglected all my friggin' life. Now, look at me.
God I hate feeling like this. I've not felt like this since Dan drove me halfway crazy for 'loving me too much'. Damn drugs.
I used to be happy.
1. I am going to die without painting for one last time because I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't need to do so for a week. Now, look at me.
2. I am going to die alone because I've been spending all my time with this amazing guy who, as it turns out, is a weirdo who sends mixed signals, gives me the - unsolicited - orgasm of a lifetime and then disappears (not literally).
3. #2 because I do not feel comfortable asking for favors. Ever. And if he wanted me, he could say so. He hasn't.
4. Savannah isn't an option either, she probably hates me to a somewhat deep degree.
5. I am crying for my little brother and my family, friends, and acquaintances whom I've neglected all my friggin' life. Now, look at me.
God I hate feeling like this. I've not felt like this since Dan drove me halfway crazy for 'loving me too much'. Damn drugs.
I used to be happy.
naughty
cheerful